Home > Sox Game Recaps > Thanks, John Lackey. For ALL you do. <- SARCASM

Thanks, John Lackey. For ALL you do. <- SARCASM

After a weekend of work and weddings… (okay, wedding, singular. But it did seem to take up a lot of my time)… I come back to look at the score. Positive thinking, I say. They were doing so well. Astros. Bah. And now that interleague is over… but I can’t finish my thought, see, because the page loads and I see what YOU DID, JOHN LACKEY.

“Overall, my arm felt pretty good,” said Lackey, who allowed seven runs on nine hits in 2 1/3 innings.

SERIOUSLY?????????? You’re STILL pulling this shit in interviews? JUST STOP TALKING. Or, hey, STOP PITCHING. Then you can talk ALL YOU WANT. How’s about from Anaheim?

I have a simple, genuine question for you all.

WHY IS HE STILL IN OUR STARTING ROTATION?

Seriously. Discuss.

~L

Happy Independence Day! John Lackey, I wish YOU were independent.

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Categories: Sox Game Recaps
  1. Jup
    July 4, 2011 at 11:13 pm

    I am starting a fundraiser to take a hit out on Lackey’s arm. I don’t want to kill him (moral reasons and all that), but I do want to make it so that he never pitches again. You in?

  2. July 5, 2011 at 6:42 am

    bake sale? i make a mean muffin…

  3. July 5, 2011 at 8:14 am

    I love muffins. Perhaps considering Lackey’s so lacking, his new nickname should be “muffin” because he’s so soft (at least well made muffins are…). Geez, he is brutal. Glad he felt his arm was pretty good. The Blue Jays left Toronto Sunday after teeing off on Cliff Lee so they did come rolling into Boston on a “high.” I’ll give them that much. Lackey was a perfect compliment to their prior day’s success.

    • Jup
      July 5, 2011 at 9:17 am

      If you LIKE muffins, then you can’t call Lackey “Muffin” because it will give the little baked goods negative connotations. And he doesn’t deserve to be associated with something delicious. How about something like Mudpie?

  4. July 5, 2011 at 9:49 am

    I’ll make cookies…and a “dump cake.”

  5. July 5, 2011 at 10:52 am

    you know the old muffins? the ones your mom made but won’t just toss out uneaten because they “used to be great?”
    so she says, anyway, but you did find the pillbury mix package in the waste basket this morning… and you know you were out of eggs, so you’re kind of wondering what she used to hold the powder together…
    anyway, you know those muffins? wrapped in saran wrap since last week on the kitchen table?
    i think it’s okay to call john lackey those muffins.

    i totally want a muffin. a real one, not a john lackey. and i can’t read the news anymore. it’s too lackluster. <-a pun. seriously. what. is. wrong????????
    why does tito hate us?

  1. July 5, 2011 at 11:15 am
  2. October 26, 2011 at 11:48 am

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