Home > Scary Red Sox Rants > The “B” on your hat does NOT stand for Bobby, Jenks.

The “B” on your hat does NOT stand for Bobby, Jenks.

Sabotage.

“Unfortunately, I didn’t say anything sooner,” said Jenks, who was placed on the 15-day disabled list on Thursday. “I just continually went out there and made it worse.”

Yes, JENKS. You did.

See, apparently, Jenks sucks now because of a cramp. A cramp he knew about. You know, knew about while taking the mound and winning for the other team?

So, in addition to ump drama (SCREW YOU, ANGEL HERNANDEZ), we have martyrs. You know, like Jenks. Taking one for the team. What a sport, right?

See, Bobby, (can I call you Bobby?) in order to be a martyr, to “take one for the team,” you actually have to contribute. You know, take one FOR the team. Not FOR the Angels. See, you play for the Red Sox. If you forget, look in a mirror. If you can unglue your focus from that mass of fuzz on your chin, look up. It’s on your fricking hat.

Or, if you have a genuine issue… I don’t know… DON’T PLAY. How about we just avoid this issue in the future by… oh, I don’t know… NEVER PLAYING AGAIN.

Oh, Pedro… were you serious about coming back? Because retired people just get fat. No, really. See? It was on Oprah.

~L

PS- So, to make fun of Jenks’ stupid goatee, I did a google image search of “stupid goatee,” thinking I’d find something hilarious. Guess what came up? Bobby fricking Jenks.

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